**Disclaimer: The information I am about to share with you is what I found to work for ME. My methods are my own, and may not work for everyone.
It’s no secret that I have been going down this road to baby for quite some time now. And while we remain as positive as we possibly can, stress really doesn’t give a shit and can show up at any time. Aside from the stress that comes along with trying to start a family, the usual day-to-day stress just doesn’t disappear.
Life has really tested us in the last few months. Between losing our first home two days before the closing, transferring to a new school, and working tirelessly to ease the financial burden of infertility all while being on a completely opposite schedule as my husband, I’m honestly shocked that I haven’t pulled a circa 2007 Britney Spears.
People LOVE to say, “Oh, just relax. Stress won’t help your situation!” And yes, while your remark was both unwarranted and unnecessary, it’s almost physically impossible to not be burdened by stress.
HOWEVER, I have found a few things that have helped me to relax and not feel so overwhelmed. Again, this is what has been working for me. I am always here to share my thoughts and opinions, but I’m not expecting anyone to agree or follow what I do. I will say this though, once I started incorporating these next three things into my life, I felt a TREMENDOUS weight lifted off my shoulders. I have learned to relax more, not explode the very moment a minor inconvenience happens, and to just let life happen and roll with it.
Acupuncture:
This is something that I have been wanting to do for a few years now, however it can be pretty pricey so I kept putting it off. Many places do except insurance but even so, a lot of places still wanted $180 out of pocket. I finally found an amazing acupuncturist, (thanks to another IVF Mama), located in Ocean called The Zen Den. It’s community based so you’re in a room with other people. When I heard that, I was very skeptical. I thought it would be noisy and crammed, but I was way off! The entire space is extremely relaxing. From the moment you walk in to the moment you leave, you feel like you’re floating on a cloud. My acupuncturist, Michelle, really takes the time to get to know you and the reason(s) as to why you’re there in the first place. I go once a week and this has been the best decision ever. The first initial price is $50 then $35 for each visit after that. Extremely budget friendly and well worth it! Taking one hour for yourself a week really isn’t that much when you think about it, but being able to just shut out the world for a bit really makes a difference.
Oils / Meditation:
Yes, I use oils. I know many skeptics and I’m going to say this once: unless you know the added stress of trying to get pregnant, then keep your bullshit remarks to yourself. Oils have been used as an all natural stress reliever for many years, and while they may not cure cancer or your ignorant attitude, they have helped me in many ways. Anyway…. Running my diffuser at night after a long day is absolutely magical. Not only does it make the apartment smell good, but there are certain blends that really help to ease the mind. I combine this with simple meditation. I sit with relaxing music playing and literally just take a few deep breathes. Working as a teacher can be extremely stressful and doing this a few nights a week can really clear your mind and assist in getting ready for the next day.
Exercise:
My last bit of advice is a no-brainer: exercise. Whether it’s going for a long walk, or just running on the treadmill, once I pop in my headphones it’s goodbye world. I just to get to the gym at least 4 times a week, usually after work at night or over the weekend. You gotta keep that blood flowing when you’re going through IVF. You also need to work off all the frustration that comes along with all the medication you’re on. There are days when I want to Hulk out and 45 minutes on the mill can typically do the trick.
All in all, you’ve got to do what works for you. It’s a tricky road to motherhood filled with many different emotions. Just don’t forget to take time for YOU. That is the best thing you can do for your mental health and well-being.